Recently I came to terms with the fact that I am no longer a "young adult". I am purely an adult, may be even approaching middle aged. When the hell did this happen? I am ashamed to say I think I was drunk for most of my 'young adulthood'. I was married with a baby by the time I was 25 years old. Two kids by the time I was 28. Motherless when I turned 31. Pretty much from my 30th birthday on, I discovered the drinks that I should have discovered in college, but was too busy working full time and going to school full time to do that kind of stuff. I was living day to day and worrying about things as they came, had no 401K, didn't even know what that meant, had no life insurance, and no idea what I would be doing next week. About 2 years ago I got my stuff together and started to plan and be smarter about things. I have always been the youngest in my crowd. I thought things were still this way, when did they change?
Well this past weekend, my Aunt, Uncle, and cousins came in from Texas to celebrate the engagement of my cousin and her fiancee. It was three days of partying. Saturday night was a family birthday party for my daughter and husband. Wine, wine, food, wine, and did I mention we had some wine? Of course we did, it was a Mammoser and Grzybowski event. But I had plenty of time to recover, the Engagement party was not until 1:00 the next afternoon. Oh yeah, but we lost an hour thanks to 'Spring Ahead'.
What a fantastic party the Engagement Party was! Live band playing Allman brothers and other classic rock, wonderful carrot cake, open bar, and dancing. Oh no... Open Bar! I even capitalized it. I did not get drunk, I can't because I am watching my calories and each one of those suckers is like 110 calories. I only get 1200 calories a day, I would rather eat them than drink them, but 3 glasses of wine and I was ready for bed. REALLY? 3 glasses of wine and I was ready for bed? How old am I? 65? I was on the couch by 5. Watched the Sabres game, then some movies with the kids. Three glasses of wine and I was useless the rest of the day. I am really beginning to feel like a failure here. Two years ago, I could drink three bottles of wine, puke, and be ready for more! Could we really age this fast?
Luckily for me, I skipped bowling Sunday night and took it easy so I could make it to work at 7am on Monday. Monday I returned to almost full speed but not for long. Monday night we had a "multigenerational, martini and pajama party" at my Dad's house. My Grandma and her friend, my Aunt, My sisters, my cousins, and my sister's friend all came with drinks, food, pizza, and Wii. We played Just Dance 2 while drinking Strawberry Vanilla martinis and eating taco dip. Great time! Unfortunately it was a Monday night. I guess 2 days just aren't enough for the weekend so we Grzybowski's and Mammoser's have to carry them over into Monday. I left at 10 so I could easily make it to work at 7am Tuesday, but I wasn't out of the woods yet.
I made it until 3:00 and somehow made it home from work without falling asleep. That didn't last long. I laid on the couch with my laptop on my lap and the sound on full blast and closed my eyes. Every time I got an email, I was woken up by the loud ding and answered my emails, then fell back asleep. Come 5:30 my day was officially over, so I shut the laptop and put it away and fell COMPLETELY asleep. So what's wrong with that you might say? Well, my dog was being boarded for the day so he didn't eat all my oak while I was at work. He had to be picked up by 6:00. I had physical therapy for mn twice broken ankle at 6:00. It was dinner time and I hadn't thought of making anything for the family to eat. I promised my sister I would bring Dad's treadmill back to his house in Lackawanna that night. I promised my friend I would come pick up her stationary bike in South Buffalo that night. In other words, I had a ton to do.
So let me tell you what happens when an old person such as myself goes out on a work night and then falls fast asleep at 5:30 at night and doesn't wake up until 6:30. First and most importantly, nobody picks the dog up from boarding. The 'Doggie Daycare' place closes at 6:00. If your dog is still there at 6, he sleeps over and you can get him tomorrow. Secondly, I miss physical therapy and since I didn't give them any notice that I wasn't coming I owe them for the session anyway. Of course my children were hungry and lucky for me my kids are resourceful. They were nice enough to not wake me up, so they made their own dinner. That dinner consisted of frozen french fries (they were lukewarm when they ate them), reheated mashed potatoes, reheated spiral pasta with broccoli, and bread with butter. Good thing I was on a low carb diet... up to that point. Well, they were full after they ate. When I was doing dishes is when I dropped some food on the floor and called for my dog to come get it... then I realized "doh, it's 6:45!"
I ran to Doggie Daycare and pounded on every door, nobody home. Then I realized how scared my doggie must be to hear me swearing outside while he was in a crate inside and not able to get to me, so I left and my dog had a slumber party. Physical therapy was closed so I couldn't call them to apologize. Next stop, drop off a treadmill at my Dad's for my sister to use. My husband loaded the treadmill into the truck. My sister is stronger than 4 horses plus me I thought no problem getting this treadmill into Dad's house. I even brought a 2-wheel cart to help drag it up the stairs. My sister and I got the treadmill out of the truck easy peasy. Getting it up the stairs into the house was another thing. This treadmill was well made. It had to weigh over 150 pounds. I'll bet you my sister knows exactly how much it weighs since I left that treadmill right on her toe. Who needs all 10 toes anyway? Everyone knows that God gave us 10 in case we lose a couple. I felt terrible, but on the bright side, my friend called to say she wouldn't be home that night so I didn't have to go get the bike. At least that freed up my night to go shopping for 30 lbs of corned beef for Saint Patricks Day. By 9:00 I was back in bed and snoring.
So not only have I realized that I am getting old, I have also lost my mind. I drank three days in a row and basically could not function on day 4. I think it is safe to say I have left my wild and crazy partying days behind me. I don't know if I should be happy that I have moved on to the next phase of my life or sad that I am so damn close to being middle aged. Pretty soon, the phases of my life will start going backwards, where I can't walk the entire mall without having to sit and take a break, can't drive myself anymore, or need help from my children to take the proper vitamins every day. It is so sad. And about always being the youngest in my circle... my boss is 6 years younger than I am now. And even sadder is that my coworkers think I am 4 years older than I really am. I just don't know when my entire world changed. How did I miss it?
